Humans constantly reinvent themselves and get to know themselves better. And that’s okay.
Keep up with me over here: at my personal/photography blog
Hello/Goodbye from Amanda Foley on Vimeo.
|
||||
|
Hello blog! Anyways, its been 24 days since my last post. Woah! Where has the the time gone. Not only have I not been writing in my health blog, but I also haven’t been reading many blogs either. I’ve had an emotional and very busy few weeks. I went for a visit home to Halifax, NS for almost 3 weeks, and I just arrived in England a few days ago. You can read up on the catastrophe that was my England voyage on the other blog. Aaaanyways, I have decided to dust off this old blog and try to write in it a little more. My boyfriend and I are living with his mum, and she is following weight watchers (and kicking ass), so the absence of junk food in the house has really made me watch what I eat, and in turn, think more about everything I’m doing health-wise. Not only is it summer (yay!), but I’m also in England, where I find it very easy to walk EVERYWHERE so I get lots of physical activity in. So, for any of you who still read this, what are your summer fitness and eating goals? Whats your plan of attack for the summer months? Hey! Anyway, as aforementioned, I don’t want my blog to be focused on these things anymore: A) Weightloss (as in, counting down the pounds) & exercise (as in sharing my workout schedule). B) Depression (because that’s something I feel as though I’ve shared too much about. It makes me uncomfortable, actually. But blogging is honesty, and so I shant delete any posts.) Like I said yesterday, weightloss and exercise aren’t a focus in my life right now. I just suck at “working out” per se, so I’m not going to stress about it right now. Why stress about it? Life is meant to be beautiful and fun.. not constantly stressful! (And focusing on losing weight in my everyday life makes me constantly stressed). I feel a little bit weird saying all that, because there are bloggers out there who are amazing, fantastic and wonderful people who make weightloss-blogging work for them. They find inspiration through sharing their everyday journey. They blog through their triumphs & their successes. They carry on. I, unfortunately, am not one of those people. I just can’t focus on weightloss enough to blog about it. That is an honest fact, and I’ve become okay with it. If I do feel as though there is something related to exercise or my own weightloss that I want to share, I most definetley will! But I just don’t want to focus on my calories, how many hours I did at the gym, or my newest attempt at working out. I find it a bland, boring and repetitive thing to write about ( I’m not saying that your blogs are boring!)…I just can’t personally make it interesting, especially when I have nothing to say. I feel a renewed sense of self in the last few weeks. Coming out of the aforementioned depression is really jazzing me up and making me want to splash colour into every area of my life. Keep checking out my creative blog to see what I’m getting up to! (I got accepted to a design program and I’m messing around with polaroid & film photography!). So, since I’ve told you what I don’t want to blog about, what can you expect from this blog in the future? -Notes on living more boldly & shaking up the routine ( Adventures for this summer include zorbing, rock climbing & kayaking) -Recipes & healthy cooking adventures ( I am going to take full and complete advantage of England’s EPIC amount of local markets & healthy restaurants this summer) -Things that make me happy (aka anything I feel like writing about that that makes me smile or enriches my life. Travel, reading, whatever) I definetly want to lose weight, no doubt about it. But I’m hoping that by working towards becoming a bit more of a happier, active, creative person…it will come off on its own. By eating fresh, beautiful food. By bike riding in gorgeous parks. By walking more, smiling more, and thinking about the little decisions I make. Once again, thanks for reading & stay tuned. Love, Hello! I’m moving in THREE days and my apartment isn’t nearly packed up yet. I have a funny feeling I won’t be sleeping much in the next few days. I was thinking tonight about…well…everything, and I’ve realized that I’m beginning to finally realize the direction I want this blog to go in. When I very first started this blog, I loudly proclaimed that I wanted to lose weight in a natural, stress-free way. I was certain that it would happen with small, undramatic lifestyle changes. It’s funny, I thought having this blog would be incredibly helpful for my weightloss. Turns out, it …wasn’t. I guess I felt as though it increased my stress towards weightloss, a little. I felt anxious and upset when I had nothing good to report. I felt like a lame blogger. Recently, I’ve been coming out of a pretty dark place. I struggled with anxiety and mild depression throughout most of the winter, and I am finally coming out of it and smiling, laughing and appreciating small things again ( I think some of it might have to do with Seasonal affective disorder, I’ve been researching it). Anyway, I’ve been exploring what makes me happy and puts a little colour into my life. Photography is one of those things, and I’ve started a 2nd blog about it. Not to accompany this one, but a blog all on its own, where I’ve been blogging on a more personal, creative level (focusing on my photography). I’d love if you would check it out! Something else that brings joy and happiness into my everyday routine is cooking beautiful, (sometimes) healthy food. I am going to keep thehappyhealthygirl.com around to focus on my cooking and baking adventures (expect lots of photographs!). A place where I can share my explorations with new recipes, restaurants and nutrition, and trying to eat fresh and healthy. That’s not to say I won’t share anything about my weight or exercise progress at all (I’m sure I will), but I just can’t focus on it. It’s not a focus in my life right now, actually. That sounds bad, yeah..I know. But it’s just not, and for right now, I’m okay with that. I’m very much hoping that I will lose some pounds as I focus on fresh food and walking as much as possible this summer. England is a very pedestrian & public-transport friendly place, so I will be out and about all the time. Not to mention, Oxford, where I’ll be living, has the most gorgeous, fantastic (and walkable!) city centre. Thank you all so much for sticking around and reading my blog. Talk to you all soon! Love, Hello!
So, as you probably (definetely) know already, I’m moving out of my apartment in 5 days! (Going home for 2 weeks, then to England for a few months. We’ll end up back in Canada sometime this fall, but to Vancouver!). So, suffice to say I’m going to be quite a nomadic lady in the coming months. I’ve been packing and throwing junk out. It’s kind of liberating! It’s giving me a feeling of new beginnings, travel and adventure. Summer is finally right around the corner and I feel like I am slowly coming back to life. Like I’m waking up from a winter of depression, hibernation, a lack of creativity and senseless eating. I am feeling so much better.
I am poor right now. Dirt poor. I am now officially unemployed and will be jobless until Nick and I are in England in a few weeks and I find a job. I have just enough money for surviving until then. So what do I decide to do with my tiny, tiny budget? Shop until I drop and go on an ebay spending spree. Yup. I’m an idiot! I took an oath a few weeks ago that I would start doing things which made me feel good. Turns out, material things make me feel good. Also, it turns out I have no self control and no sense of a budget. At the absolute worst time. D’oh!…Luckily, I still have enough (kinda) to make it stretch out for the coming month of unemployment. I hope. The “good” news is I bought some lovely spring/summery clothing which actually fits me and makes me feel confident when I wear it. Which is an amazing thing! For months I’ve been in a fashion funk, only wearing disgusting, baggy clothes that gave me no confidence or shape. Moreover, my little ebay spree has landed me with 5 (yes, 5…) new cameras. (I realize how extreme I am and how unessecary it was to buy FIVE cameras!). I got 3 polaroid camera’s, some pola film, and 2 vintage 35mm film cameras. Photography is a passion of mine. I haven’t really put my “arty” stuff online (on my flickr), but I plan to in the coming months. I plan on summer 2010 as being a time of creative exploration and learning how to properly shoot film, and even develop it, as well as developing my talents for digital photography as well. My boyfriend’s mum is a professional photographer and I can’t wait to spend the entire summer picking her brain about everything photography related, and *hopefully* getting to play with some of the cameras she has an extensive and extremely impressive collection. I have decided to start a personal photography-focused blog. I’m very excited about this, and I want to challenge myself to finally take on creative projects and share them. I know I can surprise myself if I try. I will share the link with you in the coming days (once I have the blog all pretty and ready to go). I’m going to keep this blog around though, and see where it goes. I still want to blog about the healthy direction I’m trying to take. I will absolutely keep posting on here, I’ve just realized that it’s definetely not going to be a daily thing. Probably more of a few-times-a-month thing. And that’s okay.
Okay, so my boyfriend and I like nice food. We love going out to restaurants, we love grocery shopping and we love cooking! I can tell you with certainty that I’m not overweight because I eat too much processed food. Quite the contrary! Its more likely because I consume epic amounts of lovingly prepared fresh, homemade foods, without regard to portion size. As we all know though, fresh, delicious food can be expensive! And as you also know, I am broke with a capital b right now. So what did I do? Went out and bought ridiculously cheap food for my last week in Montreal. I guess it was my way of punishing myself for shopping on ebay when I couldn’t afford it. So my cupboard is filled with instant ramen noodles, kraft dinner and canned soup. It’s all I’ve been eating and I feel disgusting. Not eating healthy really is a punishment for your body. So I made the wealthier boyfriend go out and buy veggies and fruit, and I am feeling much better. I guess this last part of the post was just to tell you about my extreme lack of intelligence in pretending that I could survive off of “cheap food” (or known to some as absolute disgusting processed crap that shouldn’t ever be consumed as an actual meal). That’s the last time I make myself so broke that I eat Mr.Noodles as a meal. I realize how hilarious this all must sound but I really am that much of a bird-brained person sometimes. Live and learn. Hope you’re all well! Hello all! I’ve been out of the blogging loop lately, both reading and writing posts. I’ve been extremely busy! I’m moving in a few days. Heading home to Halifax for 2 weeks to visit family, and then flying onward from there to the UK. So needless to say, I’ve been extremely busy with cleaning, packing, and trying to downsize my life to fit into 2 suitcases (which is project impossible!). Anyone want 5 garbage bags worth of clothes? I’m getting rid of ‘em! Aside from my lack of blogging and being extremely busy, I’ve also been thinking about this blog. Is it my niche? It’s only something I really feel like doing once in a while, and when I do write in it (lately), its mostly nothing to do with happy or healthy living. For the last few weeks it focused on my depression. Now that I’m starting to feel better, and was thinking ” What should I blog about?!”..I realized something. This is not my niche. Health blogging is NOT my niche. Not because I don’t want to be happy & healthy, but because it’s not something I can easily write about. I often struggle with topics for posts because I’m not being particularly healthy.There are other topics, such as photography, which makes my heart sing, which I could ramble about endlessly. However, all that being said…I’m sticking with this blog, for the time being. I don’t need to compare myself to anyone else, or anyone elses blog. I got caught up in the idea of being a big, successful blogger and having hundreds of adoring fans. I need to remember why I started this… to better myself. To record my journey of BECOMING healthier. Not to blog about my already fabulously healthy lifestyle. I started this blog as an diary to my lifestyle changes, in the hopes that I would find support and advice from others in the feedback from my posts. So I’m going to stay. I’m not the most fabulous writer, and I’m not the most exciting blogger, but thats okay with me. Thank you to those of you who are reading this. I appreciate your comments and I appreciate the friends I’ve made online! Love, Okay, I’m done with posts about depression and all things related. I want to post about my weightloss and happiness today! I randomly got on the scale about 5 minutes ago and it said 189.4lbs 189.4! Highest weight ever: 204lbs (November 2009) Starting weight on thehappyhealthygirl.com: 195lbs (Feb 2010) Wait, what? I’ve reached my first goal! I’ve lost 5lbs. It may have taken me TWO MONTHS to do it, but I’ve done it. And that feels damn good. I’ve been angry at myself for slacking at everything (tracking food, exercising, bingeing)…but clearly I’m doing something right, because I haven’t gained, and I haven’t stayed the same. I think reaching my first goal really has put a spring in my step. I feel ready and confident to tackle the next one (-10lbs)…and tackle it in less than two months! Another reason I think why I’ve lost the weight is the RIDICULOUS amount of walking I’ve been doing. The weather in Montreal has been lovely and warm, and my boyfriend and I have been walking absolutely everywhere. Epic, long walks. Trying to enjoy the city a little before we leave. Even though I’ve professed my hate for montreal several times, it really isn’t that bad when its warm and sunny! I am feeling great today, and I am fully comitting myself to losing more weight and feeling even more fantastic. I can do this. And Mary, (amerrylife.com) Happy Birthday! and also, thank you for inspiring. Your attitude and perseverance are a huge part of what keep me going. I just have to read a post written by you and I refocus. Have a fabulous 24th! Hello! Firstly, forgive me for my fairly inconsistent and emotional blogging. I’ve been really working on myself lately, as I mentioned, and sorting out my negative emotions. I’ve been doing alot for myself. I bought myself some books, as I mentioned before (working my way through a great read at the moment). I also bought some lovely smelly bath products from Lush, which I’m looking forward to using later this evening. I know it all sounds fairly consumer-istic…but, I guess certain items/products for myself isn’t always a bad thing. I’ve also been thinking about the reasons I’ve felt depressed and anxious. I’ve narrowed it down to a few key reasons (and I’m sure I’ve mentioned them before, but anyway, here they are in point form) -Lack of purpose (dropped out of school, working a job I don’t enjoy) All of which lead to me heading to a pretty dark place and stopping taking care of myself. My little efforts of healthy eating and exercise were constantly being overshadowed by the pulls of depression and the laziness that goes along with it (i.e not wanting to get out of bed). Even days when I seemed peppy on the blog were sometimes pretty awful days. I’m trying hard to change all of this. One step at a time, One day at a time. Here’s how.
I have decided that I want to be a web designer. Its going to be hard and frustrating to learn all of the stuff I need to know (XHTML,CSS, javascript,etc), and learn all of the software…but its what I want. I’m ready to start working towards it and start learning. Now all I need to do is decide if I truly want to go to college for it, or go the self-taught route, using books,tutorials and web certification. it feels exciting and daunting to finally know what you want. -Lack of social circle (all of my friends are in my hometown and I did a horrible job at making new friends here) I’ll soon be home for a visit (so excited), and then onto England where I’ve got some fabulous friends. (See, its Montreal thats the problem! Stupid city) Bye Montreal. I’m living here for 12 more days. YES! -Missing family/friends Going home for a visit soon, as aforementioned. Double yes! -Massive weight gain A work in progress. I need to feel better overall before I can tackle a project like that, but its coming along. I’m making better choices everyday, and I’m soon hoping I have to motivation to take that very seriously. I want to share my successes with all of you and start living the healthy life my body deserves. Sorry for the epic diary-like post. I just thought I’d spew it all out and move on with it. I’m looking forward to the coming months. I’m ready to move on. I’m ready to do a 180. Lets make this the best summer yet. Who’s with me? love, Today is another day of positivity. It’s been so rare for me in the last 6 months that when I feel happy and optimistic, I feel as though it needs to be announced. Yesterday I told you that I was going to start taking better care of myself. Treating myself to little things that I’ve stopped doing, lost interest in, or forgotten about. -Generation A , by Douglas Coupland (wonderful author) I’ve had my nose buried in the latter all afternoon. Along with a semi-nap and a snack. Life is good, breathe in, breathe out. I’m happy to be reading again. It’s true that I have a whole helluva lot to tackle today, but I needn’t let it overwhelm it. I’ll get to it right after a finish the next chapter xx P.S. Hey guys! Hope you had a fab saturday. Mines winding down a bit early as I have an early work day tomorrow (boo!). I made a vow to myself yesterday that I would start to treat myself better.I started today by waxing my eyebrows, doing a facial mask & baking some fresh bread as a treat. I also counted my calories today for the first time in memory, which is a great first step back into the weightloss side of things. I logged it over on my food blog http://food.thehappyhealthygirl.com/ My boyfriend and I had a long chat yesterday about reasons I gained so much weight and fell into such a rut…and in turn became depressed. Am I being rambly and incoherent? Point form time! -I used to do a facial mask a few times a week (getting back on that). I also have become really lax with most things beauty related (painting my nails, doing my eyebrows, dressing semi-fashionably). Time to get back on the horse. -I’m going to start READING again! I’ve got a new goal of finishing 10 books by the end of 2010 -I used to do yoga. In 2007/2008, I did yoga 3-4 times a week, and it showed, both in my mood and body. -Sleep. Lately my sleep schedule has been so off. Because of a random work/life schedule, most of the time I stay up until 3am and sleep in until noon. This is awful! By the time I’m fully awake and ready to tackle my day its 2 or 3 pm. I used to go to bed before midnight and wakeup nice and early. I feel like I have a full day ahead of me when I wake up early. I need to start having a better and more healthy sleep pattern. I’m feeling positive today. In a bout of depression and anxiety, the only thing you can do it make plans and take steps to yank yourself out of it, and I’m doing just that. Oh, and on the weightloss side of things, I’m going to be using livestrong.com (the daily plate app) for the next week to try it out. I really like it so far! xx |
||||
|
Copyright © 2010 happy cooking! - All Rights Reserved |
||||
Recent Comments